Growing Up in Working Class Youngstown — Senior Proms

Preprom

Ken Stokes, CC BY-SA 3.0, Via Wikimedia 

It is prom season. These days, it seems a much bigger deal than it once was involving stretch limos and coordination of dresses and men’s wear, and sometimes elaborate after-proms.

 

Did you go to your senior prom? I did. I dated a girl (a sophomore) throughout my senior year at Chaney so we had both kind of expected to go. We went with another couple who did the driving. Those were the days where you bought a corsage that you pinned on the girl’s dress–always a bit of a scary experience! I think the wrist corsage is a great idea.

I don’t have any pictures from that night. Dad’s camera did not work for some reason when we came by to take pictures. Perhaps that was just as well. Crushed velvet was in fashion for tux jackets back then, and I had one in blue (which did match my girlfriend’s dress). I’m kind of glad there is no evidence!

We went out for dinner at Palazzo’s. I actually don’t remember much about the dinner except that the food was good, and I paid. Then we arrived at the prom. I think we made some kind of entrance as a couple. I have to confess that my memories are pretty vague here. There was some kind of seating of the prom court, lots of dancing, punch that really was just punch.

Eventually we made our way to the after-prom, which was at Wedgewood Lanes, if I remember. We snacked, talked to friends, bowled and partied until nearly sunrise. I think that was one of the really cool things–this was the night without curfew. I remember being so tired–a bit loopy by the end–and getting ready to bowl the ball only to drop it behind me. Watch out friends! You can tell that late nights were not my thing.

We dropped off dates, went home and finally caught a bit of sleep after a quick report of “fine” when our parents asked us how the prom was. Then it was time to get the tux back to the rental store. I have a hunch that with flowers, dinner, the prom itself, after prom and tux rental, I spent maybe $150, probably less. Wikipedia says that the average price of a prom in 2013 was $1139.

The truth was, by the time of the prom, the relationship between my girlfriend and I was strained. I suspect we were holding out so that we could have someone to go to the prom with–you could probably go without a date but I don’t know anyone who did. A month later, the relationship was history–probably a relief to both of us actually.

It’s funny how often it seems to work like this–although I also know friends who married, and are still happily married to, their high school sweethearts. I can’t say that my senior prom was that special of an experience. But it was part of the celebrations that marked this rite of passage from high school to young adulthood for many of us. It was a kind of entry into adulthood. The girls we saw everyday in jeans and t-shirts or sweaters suddenly appeared as beautiful women. And scruffy boys cleaned up and for a night looked like a young approximation of James Bond (that’s probably an exaggeration in my case!). It was a bit of a “Camelot” type of experience, before our entry into the world of work, or the preparations for a career in college and graduate school. We danced with the sense that all our life was before us.

This year marks 45 years since that prom and graduation. How does that happen? We’ve watched our son go through the same prom rituals (and this time the camera worked and we still have the pictures). Now we pass by homes where others are taking pictures, or we see the pictures on Facebook. And we think, there was a time…once we were young…what a couple we made!

 

 

Growing Up in Working Class Youngstown — High School Graduation

Receiving my diploma from Mr Maluso, Chaney H.S. Principal. (Photo scanned from 1972 Lariat, photographer unknown)

Receiving my diploma from Mr Maluso, Chaney H.S. Principal. (Photo scanned from 1972 Lariat, photographer unknown)

Driving through our neighborhood today, I noticed all the banners congratulating graduates from our local high school and this took me back to my own graduation, June 8, 1972, from Chaney High School. Graduation actually took place at South Field House, behind South High School, because Chaney did not have an auditorium big enough for our class and the parents and relatives who came to celebrate with us. As I recall, we had one of the largest graduating classes in Chaney’s history–I believe 462 students. We had gray caps and gowns with scarlet tassels–Chaney’s colors [one of the comments posted reminded me that the boys had gray gowns, the women scarlet, and our tassles had both colors]..

Our commencement ceremony was really the last in a series of events that marked this rite of passage from high school into what for many of us was the beginning of adulthood. There had been the senior prom (yes, I had a date, and yes, we broke up a month after the prom!). Then in the week before graduation, there was a senior banquet, where I believe people received a number of different awards, a baccalaureate service, and finally the commencement, at which we received our diplomas.

I actually remember only one of the class speeches from commencement, the one I had to give. I don’t even remember most of what I said, except for the title, which was drawn from the James Taylor/Carol King song, “You’ve Got a Friend.” I don’t remember the photographer who snapped the picture of me receiving my diploma that appeared in our yearbook (The Lariat). I do remember being surrounded by family outside afterwards and receiving congratulations.

And then we dispersed to pursue our lives. From our class Facebook group it appears that some have stayed in fairly close contact with each other. Other than my contacts with some classmates on Facebook, I am still in touch with only two–Roger, who was the best man in my wedding, and Paul, who is my brother-in-law.

We pursued many different paths. Some followed their fathers into the mills or onto the assembly line. When the mills closed, many migrated to other cities to find work. Some bounced around for a time before they found their passion in life. Ed O’Neill (of Modern Family fame) didn’t go to our high school, but was around Youngstown State about the time we were there (I actually think I remember him working at the pub in Kilcawley Center). His seemed to be that kind of story, and he obviously turned out all right. It seems like life worked out that way for many of us. Some married early, some later. A few died young–one friend in a tragic auto accident.

Some of us went on to college or even graduate school. We became white collar professionals of various sorts, and yet many I’ve talked with still feel like we are working class under the skin. We learned the languages and practices of professional life, yet it never felt quite natural. We knew this when we rubbed shoulders with those from different class backgrounds. We felt like we were learning a dance whose steps we never quite mastered while they danced effortlessly. Still, many of us loved our work and the work ethic we learned growing up led to varying degrees of success.

It is hard to believe that this was forty-three years ago. We walked out of South Field House with all our lives and dreams before us. It feels like the blink of an eye, and yet it is this rich space filled with joys and struggles around work and marriage and family, of children and grand-children, and the losses of parents. Maybe life didn’t turn out as we dreamed, but all of us probably have had experiences we’d never dreamed of and would never trade. In many of our families, we are the elder generation. Our kids may have kids but we never stop being parents. One day they’ll understand as well…just like all those kids receiving diplomas this spring.

Growing Up in Working Class Youngstown — Football

Friday nights in the fall meant one thing in Youngstown, as in so many towns across the country–football! In a town where hard physical work was the life of many, the brawny contests on football fields across the city were an integral part of the culture.

It began with pep rallies on Friday afternoons. Then there was the special homecoming game after elections of the homecoming king and queen.  Those were always the cool, good looking kids. I never stood a chance! But you found a group to go with to the games, cheered the team on, and avoided the fights that sometimes broke out after games between people from rival schools.

But the big thing was the rivalries. One of the most famous out of Youngstown was, and still is, the Cardinal Mooney-Ursuline rivalry. These are the two Catholic high schools in the city and to this day is one of the most celebrated high school football rivalries in Ohio. We tended to root for Ursuline, where kids from the West Side went who didn’t go to Chaney (except when they PLAYED Chaney). So wouldn’t you know it–I go and marry a Mooney girl!

Scanned from 1970 Lariat

Scanned from 1970 Lariat–City Series Champs!

Our big rival at Chaney was Austintown Fitch.  The Fitch game was usually early in the year and a good bellwether for what kind of team we had. Chaney and Fitch were in different football leagues–Chaney was part of the Youngstown City League, and most of our games were against other Youngstown City high schools (this was in the day when there were six public high schools in Youngstown).

Scanned from 1970 Lariat

Coach Angelo: Scanned from 1970 Lariat

Lou “Red” Angelo was the coach I most remember.  Mr. Angelo was also my gym teacher and his “no nonsense” approach and willingness to push guys hard probably contributed to the number of winning teams he produced. His son, Jerry Angelo, was a general manager of the Chicago Bears from 2001 to 2012. Ed Matey took over coaching the Chaney Cowboys in 1971, the fall of my senior year.

The death of the steel industry and population loss in Youngstown also led to the demise of the City League as four of the six high schools (Rayen, North, South, and Wilson) closed and Chaney became a STEM-focused school. Only East High School now has a football team.

The demise of the City League hardly spelled the end of football fever in Youngstown. The Browns-Steelers rivalry is still alive, with Youngstown the “no man’s land” between Cleveland and Pittsburgh. While City League football was waning, Youngstown State came alive under Jim Tressel, winning four Divisional National Championships and building Stambaugh Stadium on the near north side of Youngstown–a prominent feature of the Youngstown skyline.

Football is a tough, physical game and a team game where no one can slack. That somehow fits working class Youngstown. That toughness is one of the reasons I remain hopeful for Youngstown. Someone knocks you down, you get up, and make sure it is the other guy on the grass the next time.

What are your football memories? Who was your school’s big rival (no trash talking here!).

[Click “On Youngstown” on the menu bar to see an archive of all the posts in this series.]